Panic Stations!

One of the things I pride myself on with trapeze is my ballsiness.  I love being up high, I love drops, I love learning things that look utterly terrifying, and I tend to be one of the first in a class to fling their hand up going "memememememememe" when the teacher offers to teach us something exciting.  Hocks dismount?  Yes!  X-man drop to cloth?  Let me up there.  Star on the bar to hocks?  Any time.

So it came as a bit of a shock when I froze in my class on Thursday.  We had been set a challenge of from sitting facing one way to facing the other in as few moves as possible, without simply swinging legs over or lifting up and turning around.  As soon as this was set I knew exactly what I was going to do - a Bucking Bronco.  This involves sitting on the bar in a straddle, putting one hand to the opposite thigh on the bar palm forwards and the other hand palm backwards (so your wrists are crossed with palms in different directions).  You then tip forward, go down and beat back up to a straddle facing the other way, and up to sit you go.  Simple.  I've done it before.  And yet...

For a good twenty minutes I sat on the bar unable to go for it.  I tipped forwards a couple of times, then brought myself back to a sit.  It got to the stage where I almost got the teacher to shove me off the bar with a stick.  I think he was also almost to the point where he wanted to (in between pissing himself).

Finally I did manage to get myself to go for it.  I didn't manage the beat back up because I got down and forgot there was another bit involved.  Of course, the second I dropped to the ground he sent me back up to do it again (which I was going to do anyway, since once is a fluke).  The second attempt didn't take anywhere near as long, and I did it again at the end of class much more quickly.  Getting back up didn't happen smoothly in any of the attempts, but I was mostly impressed that I went from screaming, to loud swearing, to quiet swearing.

I'm still not 100% sure why I had such a problem going for it.  Admittedly, the first time I learnt it I fell of the trapeze - it was on a doubles bar and I didn't straddle wide enough so my heels hit the pegs and I let go of the bar in shock.  However, I got back on and did it again successfully so it wasn't like I feel off then hadn't done it again.

I do think there was a slight aspect of not trusting my arms to catch and hold me.  I have this a little with rolling forward from stand to sit where I'm not totally sure I can hold myself.  Of course this is ridiculous.  I'm happy inverting in the ropes (kinda arm heavy that...), can hold an eagle no problem, and my objection to flag is the pain more than the holding.  I'm also fine going forwards from a front balance to either hang/beat, catchers or to (attempt) belly spins.  So going off the bar forwards isn't a particular issue.

While I can't say I enjoy that level of fear on a trapeze, it was probably good for me.  It's helpful to have that feeling every so often to remember what it's like, and now I know that even if I'm scared I can push through to get the move.

Plus it was hilarious ;)